creole

2003-03-14T01:20:00.000-05:00

http://www.xanga.com/wl003j

2003-03-14T01:19:00.000-05:00

From now on, I'll switch to the xanga.com to post my diary.

2003-03-14T00:46:00.000-05:00

Haven't done much the whole day. Just stayed in my room and "tried" to clean up. (but the room is still in a mess) I've been spending the whole day looking at stuff on Ebay.

2003-03-13T00:09:00.000-05:00

Feeling sick...sore throat, headache...it seems like I've got a slight temperature. Should head to bed and have some good sleep to recharge myself.

2003-03-06T00:16:00.000-05:00

fuck the computer...i just lost my whole lab report!!! I've been doing it for hours in the library and saved that on a floppy disk. The goddamned disk is broken and I can't load the file. The report is dued in 12 hours. There's no way that I can rewrite the whole thing now. Lemme just shoot myself...=( Sucks...another day without sleep...i just wanna cry..............................................................................................................

2003-03-05T23:57:00.000-05:00

extremely exhausted from a long day...only slept for 4 hours this morning. I still have a chem lab report to cram. The computer program for drawing chemical structures drive me crazy. I spent hours figuring out how to write out the mechanism. gotta go...too tired to write anything here

2003-03-04T16:10:00.000-05:00

stuggling with BCS...sigh...=(

2003-03-02T14:41:00.000-05:00

in a nostalgic mood

2003-03-02T01:10:00.000-05:00

I couldn't concentrate the whole day. My is so fully occupied. I'm now listening to some old songs from the Goo Goo Dolls. They remind me a lotta things back home when I was young. I used to listen to their songs over and over and I wouldn't get tired of. It's been years ago...Things have changed...The past seems to be so far away and unreachable. Hardly can I recall any specific events happened in my life but my heart feels sad. What has happened to me lately? I'm in such a retrospective state.

2003-03-01T13:55:00.000-05:00

Anyway, a very nice friend asked me to go ski tonight with some of her friends. I would really wanna try but I feel like I don't have the energy to do the sport. I haven't been having enough sleep for the whole week and today will be a good day for me to catch up with some rest. Another friend asked me to go drinking in her bf's place later tonight but I don't feel like doing it either. I need to hibernate in my bed and have some deep thoughts. I was on the phone with someone last night and we talked about various things. We touched some religious issues, the meaning of life (it sounds corny, i know) and other social problems. I'm so grateful that he has the patience to put up with my obstinacy. We always have to big argument on different sects of religion. I don't happen to be baptised as a Christian but it doesn't mean that I don't understand its belief. He's more of a person who does thing like praying before meals, going to the church (occassionally)...but to be honest, I don't find him that much devoted to God. He has all these things to say about his religion but I've not quite sensed that he's the kinda love for others. He claims that it's God's will to guide a person. So all he has to do is to spread the message of the Christianity. From my own point of view, I see things as it's like out there, there're people in need of love and support, and I'm willing to help them. I feel sad for them and I really do. I'm fortunate enough to have such an affluent life but I always think of the less fortunate one. I'm so confused and conflicted. And I can be depressed from even thinking of it. I just don't know what I should do. Am I supposed to enjoy my own life and remember that there're people still suffering from all forms of pains? It certainly is one way to lead my life but is it enough? Do I have to do something else? Do I have to live in a less comfortable life? Who knows? Maybe some of you can give me some insights....I even doubt that anyone will ever read my web-diary. Yet, it remains a good way for me to think through the things I've in mind when I write this.

2003-03-01T13:26:00.000-05:00

I was going to the mall to get a cellphone yesterday but my friend decided to go shopping first. We went into this store and put things into the push cart like we're crazy. I bought two summer purses, a pair of casual sandals and a toy thing for the baby shower that I'm going later. Then I bought more things online. It seems like my life here involves shopping only. Personally, I don't find myself very fond of shopping but I guess I'm too bored and have nothing better to do. I don't need all these new clothing as nobody dates me anyway. What's the point of dressing up for those boring classes? Hopeless school life...

2003-02-27T17:44:00.000-05:00

YEAH, I got my package this afternoon. It's the makeups I ordered earlier. I've just tried out the nail polish. The baby pink looks kinda cute but the sheer lilac is too light that it can hardly be noticed. The foundation comes in a nice bottle but the colour is much darker than the online palette. Well, I might try to have a darker skin tone fothe summer. For the eyeshadows and liners, they're alright. I don't need anymore but I just happened to have bought them...haha...I'm kinda excited to try out the navy mascara. I have always use dark brown or black. This new colour will certainly be an interesting make over!

2003-02-27T00:24:00.000-05:00

The coding for the eyetracking experiment went pretty well this morning despite the fact that the computer crashed once. I lost some data but not much fortunately. I'd some difficulties during the calibration of the tracker at the beginning. I tried at least 5 times! I was worried that I couldn't finish the experiment in time but it actually ended much earlier than I thought. I now have more confidence in running the experiment. Anyway, I NEED a cellphone. My old cellphone isn't working. The mic broke I think as people cannot hear me on the other side. I got this cool colour screen phone over Xmas at home but I've lent it to someone. So I have no phone to use! Probably, I'll buy a cheap one in the mall later. I feel like I'm so out of contact as my friends can reach me. Technology certainly makes life easier =)

2003-02-27T00:14:00.000-05:00

Today's a good day for me. The very first time that my BCS class ended 5 mins early. I returned to my room and haven't done much since then. I went to the gym and did pilates. I tried yoga before but it's my first time to do pilates. It's rather interesting but I prefer more vigorous exercises. I was going to swim after the pilates and I didn't do it. Well, I spent so many hours doing online shopping. I bought a lotta new things. =)

2003-02-24T22:37:00.000-05:00

Looking forward to the the weekend despite the fact that today's only monday! My friend and I plan on drinking and getting drunk again in her bf's room. Can't wait. =) I love drinking...especially when I get drunk. haha...

2003-02-24T22:29:00.000-05:00

I haven't talked to my mum for the past few days as I've been out till very late. Tonight, I'd Thai food as dinner with a friend. I was going to swim some laps but I didn't go (as usual). I need to get in shape! I wanna get all those pretty summer dresses and sandals. I need a car. If I'd a car, I would have moved off-campus and have my own apartment. Then, I can throw parties and invite friends to come over. How pathetic to be stuck in a dorm room for almost three years! And for next year, very likely will I stay in the same place. Life here is not bad at all if you've car. I figure it'll simply be fun driving around alone. I told my mum about it but she reminded me that I don't have a license yet. too bad...I'll have to continue my boring campus life without a car. Nowhere can you go without a car. =( how sad.

2003-02-24T17:40:00.000-05:00

I¡¦ve heard the most terrible thing in my life. My friend told me something about this couple who I kinda know them. They¡¦ve been together for two years lived together for a year. But they broke up a few days ago. The guy saw my friend two days ago and told him that he¡¦s found a new partner. When he¡¦s trying to show my friend his new love¡¦s picture, my friend expected to be a very pretty girl. BUT, it turned out to be a guy¡¦s picture. My friend was so shocked and so was I when I was told. That guy is gay! Personally, I don¡¦t see problem with someone¡¦s sexual orientation but he¡¦s been together with a gal for 2 years. The most annoying part about this guy was that he asked the gal if she still wanna be with him. What the hell was he thinking? His ¡§gf¡¨ said if you¡¦re bi, we might still be able to be together. But you¡¦re gay. I mean, how dare could that guy say such things. He told my friend that he like the girl¡¦s personality but has no physical interest. I feel so sorry for the girl. There¡¦s really no point of gay people trying to force themselves to have a relationship with females. I am not trying to discriminate against any group but it¡¦s just unfair if gay people know that they won¡¦t like females itimately anyway.

2003-02-23T21:01:00.000-05:00

I'm so goddamned annoyed by the fucking BCS course. My eyes hurt me like hell. I can't read that paper anymore. I haven't been turning in any assignments for that course. I can't fail that course or I don't have to graduate. How stressful! All these craps that I've to face. The worst of all is that I'm now messing around doing nothing. My friend and I are just crazy now. We drink and get drunk and do wild things. My parents will be pissed if they know what I've been doing now. SCHOOL SUCKS. The snow has been so heavy these days. Please have classes cancelled tomorrow. I don't wanna do any work. Right now, longing for the coming weekend and to drink with my friend and her bf again. It'll be a blast!

2003-02-23T19:34:00.000-05:00

Confused...conflicted...depressed...procrastinating...someone please help me!

2003-02-23T19:33:00.000-05:00

Sunday evening...the worst time of the week. Stressing out from the BCS assignments again. This time, I'll have to read 30-some pages and answer many questions in 2 hours. Simply impossible. I've spent my whole afternoon searching air ticket and accomodation for the spring break. My friend and I had have decided to go to Montreal. We bought the ticket and 5 nights hotel. Both of us are very excited and looking forward to the trip. It'll be a good one! =)

2003-02-22T14:58:00.000-05:00

Anyway, life is quite boring at school. It seems like the whole school is in love. Almost everyone I know is dating. I'm stuck in Rochester alone. =( How lonely. My friend and her Korean bf are so in love. So envy them....

2003-02-22T14:50:00.000-05:00

I went out with a couple of friends last night till very night. We'd dinner, dessert, movie, pool and again food. I didn't come home until 3am. We watched the American version of RING. It's a rather spooky movie but I think the original one is better.

2003-02-20T23:14:00.000-05:00

Anyway, the spring break's approaching! My friend and I plan to visit Montreal. It seems to be a very pretty place. We'll get the air ticket and accomodation by the end of the week. =)

2003-02-20T22:48:00.000-05:00

I'm done for this week. I've stayed up till 6am this morning to cram my chem lab report. It's so tedious. I was going to take a long nap once I finish this afternoon's lab. But then, I went shopping with a friend. It's a wonderful thing to do after working "hard" on school assignments. haha...I bought myself a couple of things. The weather is still very cold right now but every stores in the mall are already selling spring and summer clothing. I saw a pair of black shoes I wanna buy but the store didn't have my size. My summer wardrobe will need many dresses. I used to wear skirts and dresses a lot at home but now I don't really care what I put on at school.

2003-02-18T16:32:00.000-05:00

I talked to my chem lab TA who is from Turkey. He's doing his first year of his PhD at U of R. He is a very nice and helpful guy. He's very clear on explaining the mechanisms of the reactions. The other TA from last experiment is from Mexico. He's also very nice. He's more Americanized and good at telling funny stories. Both TA's are wonderful and make the lab much more interesting than it is. The only thing I don't wanna do is the lab reports. I've one due in two days and I haven't even started. Man, I'll have to stay up for the next two days.

As for my linguistics class, it's crazy. The Prof. has assigned some phonology problems to work on but they're mad hard. I've no idea what's going on even he went though them in class. It seems like I've lost much interest in phonology. I guess I'm more into the actual phonetics part. Phonology is more to deal with hypothesizing theories. I've to read all those journal papers which are quite imcomprehensible. Hopefully, things are going to get better later in the semester

2003-02-18T16:31:00.000-05:00

I got out from lab early today! YEAH =) This morning has been a hectic one. I got this first subject to run for the eyetracking experiment. The very first subject that I ran alone. I got kinda screwed at the beginning as I didn't remember how to do the calibration of the tracker. Lucky that my supervisor was in his office and I called him. Then the actual recording of the experiment went well and just within the time. The subject has been very patient and cooperative. =) If not, I'd be more nervous. On friday, I'll have another subject! Should be fun this time.

2003-02-16T20:20:00.000-05:00

Another week has gone by. I was just talking to my friend. We're planning where to go during the spring break. She's very fond of California and plans to go to either LA or SF. I kinda wanna go to SF as I haven't been there before and I can also visit an old friend. It'll definitely be wonderful. Also, I might visit my cousins and see their new home. But I just find flying very tiring. I'd rather stay at school and sleep late during the break to catch with my sleeping time. I haven't been sleeping well lately as there're a lotta things going on in my mind. I'm so conflicted right now. I'm being twisted between a studious nerd and a party animal. When I'm in between the two extremes, I feel depression. It indeed doesn't feel good. How should I do?

Anyway, a friend is going to cook dinner for a couple of us later. She's such an adorable girl. The pasta she made last summer was so tasty! I can't wait to try her cooking again. I kinda wanna go shopping coming weekend. I need some posters or pictures to decorate my room. I never like my dorm room a bit so I don't even bother to make it more homely. I have been thinking of getting some comtemporary drawings for the walls. This might help brighten my mood and add an artistic touch to the boring dorm room.

2003-02-15T23:59:00.000-05:00

It's been a couple of days since I last wrote something here. I was just trying to purchase a new cellphone from the amazon.com. It's a very good deal. I wanna get the motorola t720i with which a full rebate is included. YET, I am not eligible for the special offer as I don't have a driving license to go through the credit check! DAMN! =( I've cancelled my other cellphone earlier as it's not working. I have a better phone I got from home but I don't have a network for it. Oh well...

I've been drinking beer last night and now. I wanna get drunk so badly. My friend said I'm in such an extreme end of either a geek or a party animal. That's so hilarious. I dunno what has happened to me lately. It seems like I can never pull myself together to concentrate on my work. The only thing that I wanna do is to go out with friends and have fun. But I've so much schoolwork to do. Can't imagine how I'll be able to get over the coming week's work. I'll be very fortunate if I can stll survive by the end of next week. Hardly can I picture.

Alright, gotta get back to my beer....

2003-02-12T18:17:00.000-05:00

2 more days to the Valentine's Day. Nothing special for me. My school friend just left me an ICQ message telling me what she's going to wear on that special day. She planned to wear a black tube-top dress which M and I got her as her birthday gift last year. I haven't seen her wear that before. I'm sure she'll be one of the prettiest girl in school! How romantic! I also have plans for Friday ---> watching DVDs. Can anyone believe it? Yes, I'm going to watch DVDs alone. Whatever.

Anyway, I finally had a chance to run the eye-tracking experiment today. Very unfortunately, the computers crashed TWO times during the process. Thank God that the subject has been very patient while I tried to pick the problem. I was supposed to run another subject but that person didn't show up. So I simply did some coding. No other exciting things happened.

Right now, I'm chillin' out a bit. I'll head to the gym to do aerobics or play some squash.

P.S. Wish me luck on tomorrow's presentation for a linguistics class!

2003-02-11T01:55:00.000-05:00

Life is tough. It seems like I don't quite enjoy my school life right now. I have enough of it and I wanna have a change. Especially, after last Sat's party, I don't seem to be able to concentrate on anything. I wanna get drunk again and dance wildly. This whole evening, I spent all my time doing online shopping. I saw some very pretty high heel shoes which I wanna get. I'm influenced by my school friend who wears high heels every day. She does so because her Korean bf is rather tall. But I don't have any guy that I need to dress up for. How sad! Friday is the Valentine's day and what am I going to do? I'm not at all excited.

By the way, I was going to ask my mum if she would let me get a car. But then, I've totally forgotten it when she called me tonight. She's been telling me about my grandma's operation and all other family things. I think I'll have much more fun if I've a car. The problem is that I dun even have a license and I dunno how to drive. How pathetic for a 21-year-old college student without a license!

2003-02-10T01:40:00.000-05:00

Alright, it's time to pull myself together and get over with weekend mood. I haven't done anything since my last message here. I've been daydreaming and taking nap the whole day. Then I ordered pizza + wings for dinner. I ate only one slice and 3 wings. I don't feel hungry at all. I only feel sleepy.......I've many big plans going on for this week and hopefully, I can at least accomplish a couple of them.

Just got a phone call from my mum. She's at the hospital with my grandma right now. Both my grandparents have been unwell lately. My grandpa slipped down on to the wet floor when he tried to get out from the bathtub. Lucky that he didn't break his ribs but the x-ray showed that he'd some fractures there. The doc gave him some medicine but he insisted to use the traditional Chinese herbal tea to treat it. Hopefully, he listens to the doctor. As for my grandma, she's being hospitalized as she's found that two blood vessels are clotted. She's the operation this morning and she's fine. =)

2003-02-09T15:29:00.000-05:00

I didn't fall asleep until 8 this morning...so screwed =(
But I don't care, I'm 21 and I can drink legally even though I don't have an ID. I'm going to be very mature once I graduate from college that is May 2004. For now, I'll have to take advantage of every chance to have fun and enjoy myself.

Anyway, are we going to be in war soon? Do we have to stock up with food, just in case? Last night, there's a sign in every bathroom saying "DO NOT USE WATER, DO NOT TAKE SHOWER, DO NOT DRINK WATER" followed by a skeleton icon. And my RA left a message on the phone warning us to stop using tap water. The first thing flashed across my mind was the water's being contaminated by biological weapons. I know I sound kinda paranoid but you know... Then this morning, the RA said the school's security has tested the water and it's fine. It was reported that somewhere out there the water pipes are contaminated by chemicals.

2003-02-09T15:19:00.000-05:00

Got drunk last night...buzz...dizzy...Zzzzz

2003-02-07T10:30:00.000-05:00

Right now, I'm in the library.

I am supposed to be either in Japanese class or eyetracking lab. But I'm in neither places. I haven't worked up to 10 hours this week for the eyetracking lab. I'm afraid my supervisor won't be too happy with it. Man, I wanna work more hours but every time I go to the lab, experiment is in progress and I can't use the equipment to code the data. And I haven't got a key to that room yet. If not, I could go anytime and do not need to find the department's secretary to unlock it.

Anyway, yesterday was a relaxing day. My chem lab was cancelled so I'd the whole afternoon and evening to do whatever I like. I got hooked up with the computer for more than 10 hours. My eyes got so sored and tired. I planned many games and watched a DVD. Guess what I watched? The Sound of Music. I know, I know, it's a classic movie. When I was young, I found those songs very interesting and I humped along. But when I rewatched it last night, I actually found them quite mundane. Well...time changes...Then I planned to go to the pool and swim for a dozen of laps. And again like last week, it's closed for the water polo team. Kinda pissed coz I called the aquatic centre just before I took off but the time I got there, it's closed. I haven't been exercising for a longggg time. I need to get in shape and stay healthy. I'm not particularly fond of the machines there in the gym. Anyway, a friend has asked me to play basketball tonight. I can do a bit tennis and sqaush but never basketball or volleyball. I don't like to have direct contact with the balls. Talking about sports, I am a fan of water sports. For a long time, I wanna learn scuba diving but my eyes don't allow me as I'd operation before and my doctor doesn't recommend it. I rather envy other people doing it but not taking the risk of potential blindness.

2003-02-05T19:03:00.000-05:00

Wanna drop a few lines before I head to the dining hall for dinner. I was going to cook but I need to use my dining plan somehow. Many people complain about the quality of the dorm food. Yet, I'm very fond of the "make-your-own" pasta dish and the chicken quesadilla. I've been having these two things for more than a year. I haven't got tired of them!

Anyway, I did a bit of coding for the eyetracking experiment. Then, I stuffed some orientation materials for the GME office. Still can't quite believe I'm doing two jobs now. Hope I can really handle them. As for my BCS class, we'd a guest speaker who is also a professor at school. I've heard of his names and seen him being cited in journals but today it's my first time to meet him. The first impression was that he looks kinda like a businessman. In fact, the image of Bill Gates flashed across my mind for a couple of seconds. Really funny. He seems to be a very nice guy. Most of all, he clarified on the Elman & McClelland's classic article.

Tonight, I plan to work on my chem pre-lab and the last lab's write-ups. I didn't do anything last night. My family called me after they came back from a short trip. I wish I could go along and get away from school for awhile. Alright, I'm SO hungry now....DINNER TIME =)

2003-02-04T19:16:00.000-05:00

Oh yes, I've got won an auction at Ebay.com. =) I received a parcel I've ordred earlier last Friday. The online picture looks nicer than what I've received but I guess it's still acceptable. Anyway, yesterday was such a hectic day. I had classes and work from 9am till 5pm. Then I spent another two hours in the library reading some linguistics articles. My body was so exhausted after all those things! Yet, I couldn't finish those reading. Right now, I'm cramming another 20 some pages for tomorrow's class. The most worrying thing is my chem lab. I've no idea how to write up the reports and those incomprehensible NMR spectra are lying everywhere on my desk and bed. Someone please help me!!!

Well, one nice thing I got is an invitation to join the Golden Key International Honour Society. I'm still thinking whether I will join it or not as it requires a membership fee of $60. Besides, I'm more interested in the Phi Beta Kappa than this. Another thing I'm planning is for the last college summer break. My dad suggested that I should look for an internship related to my major and interest. But I don't quite have any idea where to start searching. I found an organization called the EarthWatch, which has many short term programmes for environmental conversations around the world. They are all very appealing but very expensive too. I'm not sure if my parents are going to pay for me. If not, I won't have the money for it. I might send them the brochure and hopefully, they'll agree on what I'd like to do.

2003-02-03T00:13:00.000-05:00

Right now, I'm waiting for the ending of one of the auction I've bidded on at Ebay.com. Only 34 minutes left. I have been watching this good for the whole day and I didn't have any work done. Fodor's Modularity drove me nuts yesterday. He loves to use analogy and to throw in Latin phrases. I have not idea what he's trying to get to. I'll have to cram that whole damn book tonight. This brain and cognitive science (BCS) course that I'm taking is really demanding. The professor assigns all these journal articles for the class and many of them are over 20 pages. A very stressful course.

The whole afternoon, I've been idling my time doing other online shopping. I've been trying to get a valentine's gift but I didn't find anything special. I'll have to do some more searching tomorrow or it'll be too late. Tomorrow will be my first day as a research assistant of the BCS department. I'll mainly responsible for the eye-tracking experiments. Hope that I'll be capable of carrying out the whole process. Besides, I'll have to get a couple of thank you cards for my friends who sent me b-day gifts. Hopefully, I'll get the time to call them personally to express my gratitude.I consider my personality very bounded to social rules.

2003-02-01T12:26:00.000-05:00

It's around 12pm Eastern time. I just got up awhile ago. Last night, I've been on an IDD call for almost 3 hours, talking with my best friend named Sum. We've known each other since the 8th grade. She's such a lovely and intelligent girl. Our conversations are always filled with joy. We talked about a lotta things like career plans, romantic relationships, and other people's business (simply gossiping).

Sum, at the moment, wants to become an English teacher. I can tell she'll become very devoted to the teaching profession. I've thought about going into the education field but I simply have too many things in mind that I dunno what to pick. Med school? Speech pathology? Graduate school for linguistics? Get a job right away? Or something else? Anyhow, the most urgent thing I've to arrange is my summer plan. Very likely will I need to get an internship or something productive. For last two summers, idling my time was all I've done. Sum is going to a programme in either Warwick or Oxford. How nice!

Gotta stop here. The Wicked Behaviourist and Handsome Cognitivist are waiting for me. (Fodor's Modularity of Mind)

2003-01-31T15:44:00.000-05:00

Well, here it is, my web diary. I've finally decided to put up one. It's a Friday afternoon right now and I'm chillin' out in my room. It's been a busy week. I just turned 21 yesterday. Nothing really special. Just another year has gone by. The co-workers in the office that I work as a part-time helper threw me a small b-day party two days ago. It's such a pleasure to hang around with them. They're all very nice people. They got me a pizza, a marble cake and a GAP gift certificate. And my supervisor gave me a merit increase on my salary today. Although it's not much, I truly am grateful that they appreciate my hardwork.